Got Fear? Six Ways to Crush Your Fears and Boost Your Confidence

No matter how much success you've seen or how great your business is doing, it can happen to you. 

I'm talking about fear.

Fear that you may not meet your goals. Fear that your next promo will fail. Fear that your business may fail.

And fear isn't necessarily bad. We all get scared or have doubts. But it's when we let our fears take over, that's when our confidence starts to waver. So instead of giving in to the fear, let's look at how you can reframe those fears, overcome them and remain confident in your business.

Step 1: Identify the fear. 

The first step - identify your fear. I mean REALLY identify it. Not in an "I'm afraid to do live video" kind of way. Go deeper than that. What about doing live video scares you? Are you afraid to say something wrong? If so, that probably means you're not really afraid of saying something wrong, but maybe you're afraid people will judge you or not like you. (#truth)

Focus on identifying root of your fears. If you get stuck, I encourage you to journal about it. Start with something like, "I'm afraid to do live video because..." and just let your thoughts flow. What comes up may surprise you.

Step 2: Determine how the fear affects you now.

Unless you understand how this fear is negatively affecting your life, you're not going to change it. Take a look at what your fear is doing to your life. What is it keeping you from doing?

Don't answer this at a base level, though. Let's go back to the example of being afraid to do live video. Maybe not doing live videos or webinars is keeping you from reaching a bigger audience. Or maybe it's keeping your engagement low. Maybe you're not getting as many sales as you could if you did do videos.

Also, think of what your life would look like if you continued to let this fear hold you back. Will you continue on the same path?

 

Step 3: Embrace your fear.

Like I said, fears themselves aren't a bad thing. It's a human thing. It's when we let them hold us back from doing something we actually want to do, or when they kill our self-confidence that's fears aren't your BFF.

So the next step is to embrace your fears. Admit you have them, but also think of what could come from embracing them and overcoming them. Imagine if you faced the fear. What would your life, or your business, look like then? Would your business expand? Would you sales increase? Would you be happier?

Step 4: Face your fear.

You can jump right in and face your fear, or you can imagine it.

Let's start by imagining. Say you were to actually broadcast live. What would happen? Is it  as scary as you think? Maybe people who have been following you start interacting with you, making you feel like you're talking to a friend. Or maybe no one sees it live and they only catch the replay. 

Our fears tend to make us think "worst case scenario!" when in reality, it's never as bad as we think it is. Plus, when we face our fears, we deflate them and take away their power.

Step 5: Boost your confidence.

If you still feel like your fear is messing with your mind, give yourself a confidence boost. Make a list of all the things you’ve accomplished in your life and in your business. It could be graduating from college (or even high school). It could be landing your first paying gig or client. Basically you’re making an “I AM a badass” list. One that will remind you of the things you’ve overcome, the things you’ve face and what you’ve accomplished.

Step 6: Visualize how you want to feel.

You have total control over your fear. You can either let it control you, or you can control it.

Visualizing yourself facing your fear can really help you get over it. Imagine yourself doing it, and imagine the outcome being amazing.

No matter who you are, fear can creep up when things don’t go as planned, or when things take a nasty turn. Either way, fears hold us back. They crush our confidence in ourselves and in our businesses. Facing them head on will allow you to overcome any fears that pop up, and move forward with total, badass confidence.

Want To Start Planning Your Vision Board Party? 

1. Download the FREE vision board party planning checklist.

2. Craft your inspiring vision board workshop talk with our FREE High Impact Storytelling Journal Prompts. 

3. Plan, promote & host your first (or next) professional & profitable vision board workshop with our signature course, Sold Out Vision Board Parties.

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About The Author

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Cyrene is a fun and accomplished workshop facilitator, learning and development guru and Human Resources professional. Being at the helm of Thrive Lounge has been a long-time dream. Through vision board workshops she plans to accomplish two-way learning. Sharing her vast years of knowledge to motivate and encourage others; while simultaneously getting the reward of great energy, ideas and questions to ponder back from each group. A super win-win. Please join our Thrive Lounge community so you too can benefit!

Creating A Vision Board? Make Sure You Have These Three Goals First

Vision Boards are incredibly popular around the beginning of each new year. Friends start hosting Vision Board parties and there is no shortage of #GoalGetter and #NewYearsResolution Instagram posts to use as inspiration for your newest workout routine, green smoothie challenge or amazing travel adventures. 

Over the years, I've created several Vision Boards and each one has pushed me to achieve a new level of success in my education, career and personal life. I am 100% a believer in the power of creating a Vision Board and speaking your success and intentions into existence. 

There are three key goals that I make sure to put on my board that give me the inspiration to keep going when times get tough.  

S.M.A.R.T Goals

Every one and their mama seems to be familiar with smart goals. So, I won't go through what they are by the acronym. In short, smart goals are well defined goals that focus on one, specific outcome and give you a timeline to accomplish it. It's no surprise that every educational institution, self-help program, mentor and goal-setting guru push people to create smart goals. When used properly….. they work.

My current Vision Board has a goal of actually paying down a huge chunk of my student loan and credit card debt. This requires that I focus throughout the entire year and have monthly check-ins with my accountability partner. I use smart goals for the larger goals that need to be broken down into smaller, bite-sized pieces.

Smart goals help you keep your eye on the prize and hold you accountable to your large long term goals.

If you aren’t familiar with SMART goals, click here for a great explanation with examples.

Dream Goals

Dream goals are those BIG HAIRY AUDACIOUS goals that take you out of your comfort zone and push you to do something you've never done before. One year, I was determined to cross the $75K/year mark income wise, so instead of making a generic goal like "MAKE MONEY" or "GET RICH OR DIE TRYING" (shout out to 50 cent for the most memorable money line in millennial history) I took out a piece of paper and wrote out $75,000 with a green marker and posted it on my board. 

Related Content: How to Guarantee Grad School is Worth Your Time and Money

This allowed me to set a floor for what I would accept as a reasonable salary for my experience and my field. Having it on my Vision Board and keeping my Vision Board visible at all times kept my end goal at the top of mind every day. After several interviews and a large pile of "no, thank you" letters, I had energy and focus in where I was going and what I wanted. 

Set dream goals that are so BIG, you'll have to stretch yourself to get there. Even if you don't accomplish what you wanted, you'll be surprised at how far you can get.  They say reach for the moon and if you don’t make it you’ll still end up in the stars. #truth

Lifestyle Goals

Lifestyle goals are honestly my favorite type of goal to set. These are the fun goals that speak your intentions into existence. (Don't you just love empowering sentences? 😃) Rather than setting a tangible, results-oriented goal, your lifestyle goal sets the tone for your big vision. 

I wanted to walk into 2017, shedding the negativity of my past and walking into a life of more adventure. How do you really find a quote for that? You don't! I was able to speak that positivity into my life by getting a collage of pictures and quotes. I found women doing yoga, and bold pink flowers that made me smile on the inside. I added quotes like "YOU DESERVE BETTER" and "LIVE BIG" and "BOLDLY GOING" to constantly remind myself of what type of energy I want to allow into my life.

Your lifestyle goals might seem slightly ambiguous, but these will remind you about the person you want to be and give you a simple guide that you can apply to multiple situations in your life. 

Using all three types of goals on my Vision Board each year helps me to create specific, granular goals as well as pie-in-the-sky goals that push me to fight harder for my dreams. At the end of the year, I'm always surprised at my progress. 

Comment below with some of your current goals!

Want To Start Planning Your Vision Board Party? 

1. Download the FREE vision board party planning checklist.

2. Craft your inspiring vision board workshop talk with our FREE High Impact Storytelling Journal Prompts. 

3. Plan, promote & host your first (or next) professional & profitable vision board workshop with our signature course, Sold Out Vision Board Parties.

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This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Cyrene is a fun and accomplished workshop facilitator, learning and development guru and Human Resources professional. Being at the helm of Thrive Lounge has been a long-time dream. Through vision board workshops she plans to accomplish two-way learning. Sharing her vast years of knowledge to motivate and encourage others; while simultaneously getting the reward of great energy, ideas and questions to ponder back from each group. A super win-win. Please join our Thrive Lounge community so you too can benefit!

How To Have PRODUCTIVE Calls With Your Accountability Partner

This year, I made a pretty big decision to intentionally piss some people off. Who are the unfortunate angry people that have incurred my wrath, you ask? My trifling student loan company.

Since I've been tracking my finances like a boss, I made a conscious decision to get out of debt. Like, completely out of debt - student loan debt, credit card debt, and all of that left over, residual debt from my early 20's (#YoungAndDumb) by my 30th birthday.

This would require an insane amount of discipline, planning, and focus... over the course of a few years. (It's like I'm training for the Olympics, but no one will hand me a medal at the end of it.) That's when I decided to get an accountability partner.

What is an accountability partner?

An accountability partner is someone that ensures you're reaching your goals by checking in with you periodically. The greatest accountability partners are your high productivity, type-A besties because they can gossip about absolutely nothing over wine for hours, but still have an off switch when it's time to work.

Why accountability partners work.

Add social pressure.

When everyone else is going to the party, you want to go, right? This is the same thing. You are making a commitment to your friend that you will accomplish your goals. Wouldn't want to let her down, now would you?

Give you a schedule.

If you know you have someone checking in with you about whether you published that blog post, you're going to make sure you get it done before your call!

Fresh perspective on your ideas.

Now, you have someone to tell you if your ideas are great... and if you need to think through them a bit more.

Play Devil's advocate.

Every idea sounds good in your head, right? An accountability partner will challenge those ideas and make sure you've thought about it from every angle.

Have I sold you on getting an accountability partner yet? Good!

How To Make Your Accountability Calls Productive

Reflect on your accomplishments and where you want to go BEFORE THE CALL.

After each accountability call (if you've done it right) you'll walk away with at least 3 to-do items. Right before the next call starts, ask yourself whether you actually accomplished those goals. If you didn't, why not? Did you only partially complete your goals?

Taking account of what you've done ahead of time will make it easier for you to translate what you've done to your accountability partner so your call is not filled with a bunch of hmmmm's and let me check's.

Also, if you have an idea of where you want to take your goals next, that gives a lot of opportunity to talk about how you will execute your ideas on the calls. Being fully prepared for your accountability call gives you an opportunity to GO DEEPER into your goals and ideas on the calls. 

Be ready to share your ideas.

Just as you'll be sharing your accomplishments and goals with your accountability partner, they will be sharing theirs with you. Listen carefully to what their goals are. Better yet, write them down so you can look back at them. Ask questions to make sure you fully understand what their next steps are.

Then (get ready for it...) share what you think about their new idea. Do you think it's brilliant? Have you done something similar and have an experience to share? Are you excited about the idea? Is there a way to DREAM BIGGER here?

Sharing your ideas and experience is a way to add more value to a conversation by presenting a new perspective that your partner may not have considered or thought about.

Keep a log of your accountability partner's goals.

Talking about your goals is all fine and good, but at the end of the year of working with your accountability partner, what have you accomplished? What has your partner accomplished? 

You cannot measure what you don't track. Keeping a long of your partner's goals will allow you to say, "Wow, you've paid off $6K in your loans in 5 months!" or "Wow, you wanted to pay off $2000 this month and you paid $3000!" It will also show you whether or not you've been successful over time. 

Stay on topic.

The one downside to having a friend as an accountability partner is when you get the urge to go WAY off topic. You could be talking about career options and opportunities and then fall way off track talking about what you're going to do the upcoming weekend. 

Guard your accountability time like the queen on a chess board. Your time is valuable and precious. Take good care of it and you'll win every time.

xoxo

Want To Start Planning Your Vision Board Party? 

1. Download the FREE vision board party planning checklist.

2. Craft your inspiring vision board workshop talk with our FREE High Impact Storytelling Journal Prompts. 

3. Plan, promote & host your first (or next) professional & profitable vision board workshop with our signature course, Sold Out Vision Board Parties.

 This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.

---

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Cyrene is a fun and accomplished workshop facilitator, learning and development guru and Human Resources professional. Being at the helm of Thrive Lounge has been a long-time dream. Through vision board workshops she plans to accomplish two-way learning. Sharing her vast years of knowledge to motivate and encourage others; while simultaneously getting the reward of great energy, ideas and questions to ponder back from each group. A super win-win. Please join our Thrive Lounge community so you too can benefit!

How to Push Yourself Out of Your Comfort Zone... And Start Thriving At Something New

About two years ago, before I became a rockstar coding machine and a Vision Board guru, I realized I made a lot of bad choices (they all seemed smart at the time) and I was standing at a dead end in my personal life wondering, quite candidly, how in the world did I get here?

Better yet, I kept asking myself how do I get out of this?

I tried everything from reading books, going to networking events, journaling, meditating, and going screen-free for an hour every morning (because that's what successful people do according to click-bait articles), but nothing was working for me. That's when I decided to find a way that would work for me and my personality.

Here are the four steps I took that pushed me to commit to my goals and FINALLY become the change I wanted to see in my life. 

Take a class that costs REAL MONEY.

Why does it have to cost money, you ask? Well, how many of us have a gym in our apartments or in our offices at work? Now, how many of us REALLY go? No matter how many free options I've ever had, the only time I've ever been consistent with going to the gym is when I'm paying a monthly fee to hop on a treadmill or take a zumba class. No matter who you are or where you are, MONEY TALKS. 

Even in goal setting, when you put your money on the line, that sends a jolt to your brain that you've invested in making this goal a reality and it is now your job to make it come true. There are plenty of places to find free classes (and I completely recommend taking them and leveling up your skills) but when you're making a BIG change to something you've never done before it doesn't hurt to have a psychological motivator to keep you going when times get tough. 

Pro tip: Take a class that has a specific date and time. Recorded lectures give you the opportunity to say "I'll do this tomorrow" or "I'm tired right now, I'll come back to this later." When you know that you have to show up on a certain date and time to take the class, you will be there, pen-and-paper in hand. (Bye-bye procrastination!)

Get an accountability partner

A good accountability partner can be life changing. In short, this is a person that calls you at a particular date and time on an ongoing basis to talk about your progress on your goals. This can be a best friend or an acquaintance as long as they're focused on helping you achieve your goals and they are CONSISTENT.

When I was preparing to go back to grad school, I was ANNOYED with studying for the GRE. To be honest, I hated it. No matter how much I knew I needed to do this to get into a good program, I could not actually stay consistent with studying. I would start, study for an hour and then put the book down for a month or two. This cycle would continue for over a year until I decided to get a study partner. Every week for 3 months, my friend and I would choose what chapters we'd study, set concrete goals in how we scored in the sample tests and call each other on Sundays to touch base. 

Hire a professional.

Hiring a professional is not always necessary, but sometimes the skills you don't have can be a barrier to getting started with your goals. For example, if you want to open a bakery and you are the best baker IN THE WORLD, but you don't know how to set up a website. In fact, you've been trying to set up this website for months and you're still confused by the software.

This website is the one thing standing in the way of you and your dream because you're spending hours on end trying to figure out something that has nothing to do with baking. Rather than using this as an excuse to push back your launch date (...again), hire someone to take care of the tech while you focus on being the best baker (or writer, or entrepreneur) out there.

Pro tip: If you don't want to go through the struggle of searching online and hoping for the best, go to upwork.com and hire a freelancer. I love this site because it's easy to compare offerings and have transparency in costs. 

Get started.

TODAY. (Yup, it's that simple.)

Want To Start Planning Your Vision Board Party? 

1. Download the FREE vision board party planning checklist.

2. Craft your inspiring vision board workshop talk with our FREE High Impact Storytelling Journal Prompts. 

3. Plan, promote & host your first (or next) professional & profitable vision board workshop with our signature course, Sold Out Vision Board Parties.

---

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.

---

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Cyrene is a fun and accomplished workshop facilitator, learning and development guru and Human Resources professional. Being at the helm of Thrive Lounge has been a long-time dream. Through vision board workshops she plans to accomplish two-way learning. Sharing her vast years of knowledge to motivate and encourage others; while simultaneously getting the reward of great energy, ideas and questions to ponder back from each group. A super win-win. Please join our Thrive Lounge community so you too can benefit!