intentional living

Why You Must Start Living Your Dream

 
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Do you ever wonder what would have happened if you followed your silly childhood dream?

I have.

For decades, I've imagined myself singing on a stage in front of a small crowd in a speakeasy. They'd be nodding their heads to my sultry melody and my words would shift them from a state of urgency to a state of understanding. I'd fill their spirit with the jazzy melodies I grew up listening to as a child.

THAT was my dream.

This year, I swallowed every ounce of you-can’t-do this + its-too-late + you’re-not-good-enough and took the first step.

I promised myself that I would sing on stage at least once.

I didn’t know how it would happen or who’d be crazy enough to put me on a real stage, but I convinced myself that no matter how small or what audience, I would find a way to make it happen. After all, I can’t teach people to create vision boards and go after their dreams if I’m not doing it myself.

That’s when I got the email. Last year, my daughter’s artwork made it into a gallery and we signed up for the email list. That same gallery doubled as a theater - and was holding auditions.

When I received the email I thought “I gotta do this. What’s the worst that can happen, right?”

I auditioned for a musical - and got one of 5  roles. (I played a ballet-dancing novice Nun in a silly musical called Nunsense.)

I could finally consider myself a real singer.

As a singer, I started my new life:

  • Practicing 3-4 times a week with the cast

  • Learning to dance ballet and tap

  • Memorize dance moves, harmony and words to 10 different songs in my free time

All to perform well for 5 shows. Then after those 5 shows, the magic was over.

 
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People clapped, we bowed and then my life went back to normal.

To accomplish this goal, I gave up my free time. I pushed myself physically harder than I ever had. I gave up time with my daughter that I'd never (ever) get back. I traded the morning and evening time I used to work on my blog for learning ballet via YouTube.

Woah.

Even though I lived my dream of singing on a stage (and had awesome pictures to show for it), I didn't feel like the spotlight was worth everything I lost.

That feeling is the number one reason you must start living  your dreams today.


I Liked The Outcome, Not The Work It Takes To Get There

It wasn't until I actually started rehearsing for my first real show that I truly understood what it took to do the work.

You might be dreaming of yourself holding a best-selling novel, standing on stage in front of millions or amassing millions of followers on your award-winning YouTube channel. The end goal sounds AMAZING, but the work lacks the same glamour and recognition.

The work requires you give things up.
The work challenges your persistence.
The work makes you second guess your abilities.

If you don’t start living your goal, you’ll never know if you’ll love the day-to-day the same way you love the end result.


I Loved It As A Hobby

I needed to take a step back. My body ached, my feet begged for relief and my daily productivity suffered due to lack of sleep.

All after just one set of performances. I couldn’t imagine getting back up to do this again. I loved the experience. In fact, I wouldn't mind doing this again… once a year - max.



Singing Is Not A Priority For Me

The more I had to leave my daughter at home each week, it started to eat at me. I was too busy during the week to spend time with her and too tired from rehearsals on the weekends to do anything with her beyond watch Netflix.

Surprisingly, I missed blogging. I couldn’t impact millions of lives all over the world with my little musical. I couldn’t encourage the women at rock bottom. I could barely find the time to support myself with the little pockets of time I had.

I realized the cost of singing was too high of a price to pay. My ability to impact others with my story is more important to me than I had ever realized.



I Wasn't Missing Out On Anything

Since college, I blamed my parents for pushing me to become a doctor and not nurturing my natural ability as a singer. They knew that it was a passion for me and instead, they wanted stability for me, they wanted me to do the college thing (which led me nowhere) and get a more stable career.

So I did.

I went to school, I looked for jobs, I started my career - all with the idea that I'd never do what I REALLY wanted to do. I'd never become a singer. Because of them, because of my daughter, because of society at large, I'd never accomplish my goal.

I thought about it as a thing far in the distance, that because I didn't have the courage, time or money, I'd never reach.

After singing on a stage, I realized that it was fun, it was satisfying, but it didn't change my life. It didn't make me any more or less of who I am. The heavens didn't open up and reveal a new life that I'd been missing out on.

I'm still Exactly. The. Same.

I needed to accomplish this goal in order to see that I could. I needed to see what it felt like practicing and rehearsing for one amazing show to know what it feels like in my body. I had to study harmony and ballet to know that my life was already filled with all the music I desired.

I needed to try my goal to stop wondering…… what if?

Maybe you do, too. Maybe it will be super amazing and you’ll start living a life that you never thought possible. Or Maybe you’ll be happy with your accomplishment but will decide to move on to the next thing. Either way, it’s better to have the answer than to always wonder. What have you been wanting to do that you’re holding back on? Time to find out the #truth.


Ready To Accomplish Your Greatest Goals?

  1. Start planning out your largest goals with the FREE Goal Planning Worksheet.

  2. Take a FREE personal development class on CreativeLive.

  3. Do you struggle with finishing the goals you start? Get clarity on your goals and the strategies to reach them with the ebook Goal Doing: Practical Advice For Goal Setting, Action Planning and Achieving Your Dreams.

Ready To Make Your Dream Goal A Reality?

Map out your dream goals and create your action plan with this FREE one-page dream goal planning worksheet.

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This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.


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About Chantl

Chantl founded Thrive Lounge to give women the kick in the pants they need (lovingly, of course) to uncomplicate their goals, stop making excuses, get productive and start living the life they always wanted. Her book, Goal Doing: Practical Advice For Goal Setting, Action Planning and Achieving Your Dreams, gives women a step-by-step guide to create, plan and achieve their grandest goals.



4 Simple Ways To Stay On Track During An Unproductive Summer

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.

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The more I focus on my goals, talk about goals, write book about goals I realize that a lot of us are going through the exact same emotional roller coaster with our ambitions. 

In January, we feel rejuvenated after spending time with family over the holidays and are overly inspired by the idea of a new year and an opportunity to create a brand new you.

In Feb - May, we pursue our goals. Somedays with passion and others with reluctance. But... we try.

Come June-July we realize the sun is out and in full effect and we can finally emerge from our winter slumber... mostly to look really good in a bathing suit on a beach somewhere. Or go to brunch. Or finally start dating again. (Just me?) 

Even though I literally wrote the book on goal setting I'll be the first to admit that ever summer I struggle to stick to my routines with the constant allure of brunch + happy hour + looking-really-good-in-a-sundress.

Instead of writing, I'm scheduling drinks with friends. 

Instead of creating a companion course for my book, I literally went on an impromptu 10-day couch surfing trek through my hometown spending time with every friend I haven't seen in a while - provided they had an empty couch.

Instead of planning out my next speaking gigs, I've been going out on dates like I'm a contestant on the bachelorette.

Yes, #TheStruggleIsReal.

 

How Can We Continue To Crush Our Goals Through The Summer? 

The answer to this question is obvious, but not intuitive. 

Choose the one goal that you want to accomplish... then slack off EVERYWHERE ELSE. 

Seriously, you're not required to be an all-around life badass all the time. It's the summer, the sun is shining bright - and there are far too many rooftop bars in New York to sit in the house worried about every possible goal.

 

How I'm Applying This Philosophy

It's obvious I've lost track of my routines and have been trending away from Superwomen towards super-slacker, but my primary goal for 2018 was to get out of student loan debt.

After paying off 10K in 2017, I started off 2018 with $32K remaining in student loan debt and one goal - to pay it all off. In the first seven months of the year, I paid of $10,647 in student loans! 

student loan payoff

 

Through the summer, I've continued to make the same large payments on my student loan debt to continue working towards my big goals.

So even though I haven't been productive, I haven't started my next book or course, I've been eating like crap and not exercising,  I've been drinking entirely too much wine (Yes, that's possible)....

I have continued to pay off my debt. 

That's all that matters. 

Related: How This 28-year-old Increased Her Net Worth By $20,984 in 13 months

 

How Can You Win The Summer? 

If you're looking at your summer and wondering what happened to your ambition, you're not alone. Here's a couple of ideas for what you can do to get your goal-getting life back on track: 

 

Lean Back

Make a firm decision that this is not a goal-getting year for you.

Sometimes we just need a break from life all together. If you firmly decide to take some time for inner reflection, you can stop feeling guilty for not pursuing a goal and enjoy your moment of intentional slowing down.

 

Course Correct

There is always time to get back on track.

If you have a clear goal for where you want to go, figure out where you are in progress towards it. Next, make a list of all the steps you need to take to get you there. Finally, take out a calendar and plan out when you're going to do each of these steps

Once you do that, get started!


Start From Scratch

It's mid way through the year and you really haven't done anything towards your goals.

That's perfectly fine! The best time to get started is always today. If you don't have a goal yet, but you're really feeling like a couch potato start with figuring out what change you want to make in your life and why you want to make that change.

Related: How To Set The ONE Goal That Will Change Your Entire Life

Once you have your goal, you can start taking steps to reach it.  


Stick To The Plan 

This is for the folks that are well on their way, but might be getting a little bored with their goal. (Trust my I'm super tired of my budget! Sometimes I want to go out and order a glass of wine without thinking about my student loans, but these days that just doesn't happen!)

Focus on the reason you're pursuing this goal. Remind yourself what your life will look like at the end of the journey. That vision will keep you going. If you created a vision board, take a look at your dream goals - and if you didn't create one maybe you should. :)

 

The beautiful weather, endless events and opportunities to see friends and family do make it very difficult to put all of your goals first. Don't feel guilty about taking this time to yourself. Instead, find a way to enjoy this moment by intentionally choosing what you're going to focus on ... and what you will ignore. 

 

Get Crystal Clear On Your Grandest Goals

Download the FREE Goal Setting Clarity checklist and set goals that will create MIRACULOUS change in your life.

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About Chantl

Chantl founded Thrive Lounge to give women the kick in the pants they need (lovingly, of course) to uncomplicate their goals, stop making excuses, get productive and start living the life they always wanted. Her book, Goal Doing: Practical Advice For Goal Setting, Action Planning and Achieving Your Dreams, gives women a step-by-step guide to create, plan and achieve their grandest goals.

Ready To Make Your Dream Goal A Reality?

Map out your dream goals and create your action plan with this FREE one-page dream goal planning worksheet.

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by Seva

Goals VS. Intentions: Why You Need Both In Your Journey To Success

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New Years Resolutions.

Goal setting.

It can all seem pretty overwhelming, right?

Well now is the time to take a step back and really find a way to make all of these things work FOR you rather than stress you out.

If you want to find success this year, you should focus on two things: intentions and goals.

Goals and Intentions – What’s the difference?

INTentions are INTernal while goals are external.

Both are necessary to find the success and freedom you’re looking for, but one should always first start with intentions before focusing on goals. Strengthen yourself on the inside and you’ll find it easier to build stamina on the outside.

When it comes down to it, intentions are a state of constant reflection while goals are a state of conscious planning.

With intentions, you reflect on your feelings in the present moment, encouraging yourself to grow and be more cognizant of your current state; with goals, you’re following a map in the hopes of reaching your end goal.

Along those lines, intentions are basically a pathway to help you achieve your goals. So, for example, telling yourself that you’re going to publish one blog post per week is your goal, learning to better hold yourself accountable to your actions is an intention.

Intentions are typically very broad, again dealing more in the conceptual realm of feelings and living each day as it comes, while goals should always be very specific.

Because of the broad vs precise nature of these things, having good intentions supports you in achieving your goals while having goals with no intentions means lots of pressure and stress from the fear of failure.

How to Set Intentions

To set intentions, you can look to those you idolize – what is it about them that you appreciate? Is it their patience? Their confidence? Their time management skills? Whatever it is, KNOW that you too can be that way by setting intentions and following through with them.

Personally, I’ve struggled with patience. It’s just not a strong characteristic of mine. This year I’m setting the intention of being more patient – not just with my kids or my clients, but with EVERYONE. Yes, even the jerk who cuts me off in traffic.

It won’t be easy, but it’s not supposed to be. Intentions are meant to be work, but in a feel-good, feel-better kind of way.

How To Set Goals

Setting goals comes more from you and your ideals. Where do you want to be 6 months from now? A year from now? Five years from now? What do you have to do to get there?

For example, if you want to be averaging $5k/month two years from now, what actions do you need to take to get there? Again, be VERY specific and write out those steps. Each one of those is a goal and requires you to take action.

All in all, intentions are a state of being while goals are a state of doing.

What will you be working on this year? I’d love to hear about it in the comments below!

Ready To Accomplish Your Greatest Goals? 

  1. Cut soul-sucking activities from your life to create a purposeful future you LOVE in 10 days with the FREE Prioritize Me, Guilt Free journal prompts.  

  2. Take a FREE personal development class on CreativeLive

  3. Design your dream life with purpose and intention with our Vision Board Creator Course.

 

Ready To Create Your Five Year Vision?

Fiveyearvision

Download this FREE Five-Year Vision Workbook to design your future with happiness, purpose and intention.

Enter your email to subscribe to the newsletter + grab the freebie!

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.


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ABOUT THE CONTRIBUTOR

Amber Temerity is an efficiency strategist and blogging mentor for those looking to run efficient (but highly profitable) online businesses. She currently owns and operates ThriftyGuardian.com .